Bumpshack.com’s ‘Top 10 Super Bowl Ads of 2009′

1. Coca-Cola: ‘Heist’ (Watch Video) - It is safe to say that Coca-Cola’s ‘Heist’ commercial was the most beautiful ad of the night.  A stream of outside critters and bugs, including lady bugs, grasshoppers, and bumble bees, work together to heist a tasty Coca-Cola away from a good looking guy taking a nap on the ground.  This ad should win awards at the National Commercial Marketing Convention or whatever they call it.

2. Telaflora:  ‘Mean Flowers’ (Watch Video) - I had never heard of Telaflora before tonight but they made a big splash with their 30 second spot during the Super Bowl.  A cute girl receives a box of ugly flowers at her office desk.  The flowers then insult her every which way in getting the point across that if her man loved her then he wouldn’t send her flowers in a box.  A very direct and brutal stab at Pro Flowers and all of the other boxed flower delivery services.  Big props to Telaflora!

3. Cash4Gold - ‘Ed McMahon’ (Watch Video) - Everybody knows and hates these Cash4Gold.com ads when they normally come on television, but the ad they ran tonight featuring Ed McMahon and M.C. Hammer was actually pretty good.  The two celebs were able to make fun of their financial hardships and earned some decent coin in the process.

4. Godaddy.com - ‘Danica Steam’ (Watch Video) - Godaddy had a couple of ad spots during the Super Bowl.  I thought the second one with Indy racer Danica Patrick in the hot, steamy shower was the best.  Horny boys at a computer, lusting over Patrick in the shower, believing they can do anything now that they have the internet on their computer.  It must have worked because they went on to add another sexy woman in the shower with Danica as she seductively washed her hair.

5. Budweiser - ‘Clydesdale Fetch’ (Watch Video) - Budweiser at its best. I am not sure how much longer they can pull off these Clydesdale commercials, but this one was actually rather good.  Clydesdale watches dog fetch stick before deciding to one up him and bring back a massive tree branch in his mouth.

6. Bud Light - ‘Conan O’Brien’ - (Watch Video) Conan is just a funny dude.  In this ad Conan is well…Conan.  There is a lot of truth in this ad about Hollywood celebrities that refuse to do commercial ads in the United States but have no problem doing them overseas.

7. Doritos - ‘Crystal Ball’ - (Watch Video) So dumb that it is actually really funny and works well off of that angle.  Nerdy office guy claims snow globe is a crystal ball to predict everyone in the office will get free Doritos.  Even dumber co-employee takes snow globe, wishes for raise, and proceeds to pelt boss in the nuts with the ‘crystal ball.’

8. Budweiser - ‘Clydesdale Circus’ - (Watch Video) Another classic Budweiser Clydesdale ad and the second one that makes this top ten list.  A mini story of boy running off to find girl, rescuing girl from circus, and dashing off to nearest field to get laid.  The song is backed by the song ‘Ain’t No Mountain High Enough’ made popular by Marvin Gaye and Tammy Terrell.  The creators of the ad should have spliced in Marvin’s ‘Sexual Healing’ after the two ponies run off together.

9. Pepsi - ‘Pepsuber’ - (Watch Video) This ad is a play off of a terrible ‘Saturday Night Live’ skit which is a play off of the 80’s hit TV show MacGyver.  In advertising you want your ad to be really good or really bad so people remember it and talk about it the next day at work.  Well this ad for sure fits the specs of the former.  Easily the worst ad of the night if you don’t count movie trailers.  Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson’s new movie would take the honor if you included it.

10. Pedigree - ‘Crazy Pets’ - (Watch Video) Makes the list because one has to think that the NFL and NBC cut Pedigree a huge discount in the wake of the Michael Vick dog-holocaust scandal for this ad. The theme of the ad is to adopt a dog or support the Pedigree adoption program.  2+2=4

- Written and Compiled by Joshua Holmes